Noelle

It has been over six years since the fateful day I stumbled upon my husband's stash of photos while we worked side by side on a project. This startling discovery initially shattered my world and my dreams and caused me to begin a journey of self discovery. A year ago, my husband shared with me the news he had an affair while I was visiting my aging mother. This blog was conceived out of my desire to provide a place of sharing, healing, and hope.

Thursday

One Day at at Time

Some days I feel on top of the world and am full of hope.  Other days I feel lost, as if I'm stuck in limbo with the world swirling all around me.  Today has been one of those days.


I know Satan is attacking the family through the fathers with pornography.  Fathers, then wives, then the children.  The domino affect is hideous and so damaging.


When I am feeling this way, I am not completely present with my children.  I sometimes hear and see them but nothing registers because I am so preoccupied with the shattering effects the pornography is having on my relationship with my husband.  


Fortunately I have moved beyond comparing myself with the women my husband is looking at.  It took a very long time for me to get to that place, a very long time.   It's our relationship I'm grieving.   Where is it exactly?  Where do I fit in?  Where do I belong?  What do I do?


With the Lord's help I am moving through this and stepping into the light of faith and hope.   He is healing me.  Instead of wondering 'Why me?'  I try to focus on what I can learn from this and what type of woman  I can become.


Today was a hard day...

Noelle




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